Love is an emotion. A very powerful one at that. When one thinks of love, all kinds of things come to mind. Movies perhaps, like Casablanca, The Way We Were, Ghost, Pretty Woman, Gone With the Wind. Or maybe a song, like “Baby I Love Your Way” by Peter Frampton, “All Out of Love” by Air Supply, “Best of My Love” by the Eagles. Or memories of the ’60s may evoke feelings of love  – Haight-Ashbury, hippies, flower power, make love not war. Without love, where would we be?

Our early love affair with our parents would’ve had a major influence, one would think, on how we would love in our adulthood. It would also have had an impact on our relationships with our friends, our lovers and later on, our own children. Mother Teresa once said, “We can do no great things, only small things with great love.”

Love has the power to move mountains. It can cause great men to weep, and it can bring those same men to their knees. Love can change everything. It can change how you see the world and how the world sees you.

Love has inspired men and women all over the world to create and to spread their wings where once, perhaps, they would not have had the courage. Love has been sought after by great poets, singers, writers and directors.

Love is defined in the Webster’s dictionary as a strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties, maternal for a child; attraction based on sexual desire, affection and tenderness felt by lovers; affection based on admiration, benevolence or common interests.

Love is what makes the world go ’round, or so the saying goes. It is one of the most powerful emotions known to man. It encompasses so many different realms, yet is so simple. Love is the one emotion that is difficult to define. In fact, in some cultures, there is no word for love. Therefore it can be said that love has many different meanings for many different people.

What’s love got to do with it? I can only conclude that love pretty much has to do with anything and everything, and anyone who is good and kind and joyful. Love is for those of us who are hopeful and happy. It gives us strength, power and the courage to continue on this journey we call life.

Photo Credit

Photo courtesy of Martha Farley – all rights reserved

This same truth reveals itself in nature, too. Survival in thriving ecosystems like coral reefs hinges on collaboration, mutual reliance, and balance. Like in the natural world, your well-being depends on the care you give and receive within your relationships. Belonging is a vital part of living fully and growing with purpose.

Let’s explore how nature, family, and community show us how connection forms the foundation for a meaningful life and how you can nurture that sense of belonging daily.

Lessons From Nature: Building Strong Communities

If you’ve ever watched a coral reef bloom with color and motion, you’ve seen how life is never solitary. Every fish, plant, and coral plays a role in maintaining the reef’s delicate harmony. These underwater communities thrive not through dominance or competition, but through connection and care.

That balance can be recreated at home. Families who set up a reef tank participate in a shared experience that mirrors the natural world. Maintaining this small ecosystem fosters patience, teamwork, and curiosity. Building a thriving reef tank offers a meaningful way to experience interdependence firsthand and to watch how nurturing one small world can strengthen bonds across your own.

Watching your reef tank flourish requires commitment, communication, and shared responsibility. This way, it reflects the kind of care that strengthens human bonds. Just as coral and cleaner shrimp depend on one another to stay healthy, people thrive when they feel supported and needed. Communities and families grow stronger when everyone has a role to play and is encouraged to show up fully. The connections that hold us together aren’t accidental. They are built, maintained, and nourished through mutual effort.

The Importance of Family and Generational Bonds

Now think about your own family. When those connections are healthy, they serve as a powerful anchor. They shape your identity, offer stability in times of change, and provide a network of emotional support. But maintaining those ties across generations can feel challenging in a world that constantly pulls you in different directions. It helps to be intentional. Strengthening family bonds across generations through small rituals, regular conversations, and shared experiences can go a long way in bridging gaps and deepening trust.

These relationships take work. Modern life often pushes family members into isolated roles, separated by distance, time, or misunderstandings. Differences in values or communication styles between generations can add even more friction. But strong bonds don’t happen by accident. They form through persistence, empathy, and a willingness to meet each other where you are. It might mean creating new habits that encourage connection or revisiting old ones that have been lost.

Overcoming Barriers to Connection

That work is even more critical when you live in a multigenerational household. Tension can skyrocket when expectations clash or space feels limited. But you can shift the atmosphere with a few intentional choices.

Set clear boundaries that respect each person’s privacy and needs. Establish routines that foster cooperation rather than conflict, and make time to acknowledge each other’s efforts, even in small ways. Transforming the challenges of multi-generational living into opportunities for connection starts with these adjustments.

Respecting Our Shared Environments

Connection begins at home and continues in how you engage with the world. Just as a coral reef depends on the choices of those who visit it, the environments you share with others reflect the respect and care you give them.

When you act with intention, you protect natural ecosystems and the emotional ecosystems you live in daily. There’s a reason small signs near the ocean ask you not to walk on the coral. The damage may be invisible at first, but over time, careless steps erode the things that make those places beautiful. The coral beneath your feet is more fragile than it seems, a quiet reminder that mindful choices protect what matters most.

The same is true in relationships; small moments of carelessness can slowly chip away at trust. But you build something lasting when you choose kindness, presence, and respect. That foundation creates a sense of belonging that supports you through life’s inevitable storms.

Belonging as a Key to Personal Growth

People who feel rooted in their relationships are more resilient, confident, and at peace. With a steady support system, it’s easier to explore new challenges, take healthy risks, and bounce back from setbacks. The impact is profound. The power of belonging to a connected community creates emotional well-being that ripples outward, strengthening individuals and the spaces they move through.

Building Belonging Through Relationships

You don’t need a dozen new connections to feel that impact. Sometimes, one deeply rooted relationship is enough to anchor you. When you create space for honesty, listen without judgment, and offer support without conditions, you nurture something far more valuable than surface-level connection. Trust grows, communication deepens, and the relationship becomes a place where both people can thrive. Building a sense of belonging through meaningful connections often begins with intentional moments: a shared meal, an open-hearted conversation, a small act of care.

Conclusion

Every meaningful connection you create adds to a greater whole. The effort matters whether you’re tending to a reef tank, navigating a busy household, or having a quiet coffee with a loved one. These are the roots that hold you steady when things feel uncertain. And these are the seeds of the kind of world you want to live in.

Belonging isn’t something you stumble upon. It’s something you build. With time, care, and attention, you can create a connection-filled life that feels whole, grounded, and shared. And that effort is always worth it.

Photo Credit

Photo is from pexels

Guest Author Bio
Charlie Fletcher

Charlie Fletcher is a freelance writer from the lovely “city of trees”- Boise, Idaho. Her love of writing pairs with her passion for social activism and search for the truth. When not writing she spends her time doodling and embroidering. And yes, she does love all kinds of potatoes!

Retirement plans are more adaptable, making it easier to transfer benefits from one place of employment to another. The other reason? Modern employees are more focused on quality of life than people of generations past had been. Folks don’t want to be miserable when they go to work. Sometimes, that means downloading a bunch of mindfulness podcasts and hoping for the best. Other times, a little more is needed.

A career change could be the perfect solution. Before you make the leap, here are a few important things to consider.

Make Sure the Move is Addressing the Cause Not the Symptoms

If you are feeling stressed or unhappy all the time it is definitely something that needs to be addressed. Most likely some of those negative feelings are centered around your work. However, that doesn’t mean your job is causing the problems.

There’s a line from an old Ben Folds song that explains our meaning well. “Everywhere I go, [Darn] there I am.” In other words, if you are feeling burnt out and anxious at one place of employment, it’s not necessarily reasonable to assume you’ll feel any better at the next.

Understand what the source of your negative feelings is before you make any life-altering choices.

What Will the Pay Situation Look Like?

The majority of modern employees say that they are willing to take a lower-paying job if it means increasing their quality of life. That is certainly a healthy mindset, but it’s important to go in understanding just how much lower you will find acceptable.

Will you need to adjust your lifestyle? Postpone retirement? If so, by how much? Depending on the type of pivot you are making, you may find yourself starting at the ground level with an entry-level position.

Not everyone is ready for that. It may be a good idea to speak with a financial advisor about how a career move will influence your long-term goals.

Have You Done Your Research?

It’s important to do your due diligence before you start making big career moves. Doing a bunch of front-end research on what the job responsibilities are like is great, but it should only be your first step. To really learn what the new gig will be like, it’s a good idea to talk to someone who is already working that job.

Think about it this way: If someone read about your current job online would they really understand what it is like to work in it day in and day out? Probably not. The same is true of any other job. If you want to learn about all the nitty gritty details, your best bet is to speak with someone who has been there and done it.

Consider Educational Requirements

Many MAJOR career pivots will require additional educational requirements. That certainly should not be a deterrent. You may be thinking, “I’m 38. I don’t want to wait until I am 42 to start a new career.”

Two things to keep in mind. You’ll be 42 in a few years either way. You can grit your teeth and suffer through a job that doesn’t thrill you until it is time to retire, or you can make a big move and close out the last twenty years of your career doing something you really enjoy.

The other thing? It might not take four years. Often, fulfilling educational obligations isn’t as complicated as many people first assume— particularly if you already have a degree.

Let’s say you graduated with a degree in English. You’ve spent the last ten years in marketing, thinking about data and funneling sales.

Your current job is about as far from nursing as a person could reasonably imagine. There isn’t even an overlap in skills. But, you’ve always been interested in healthcare, and now you’ve decided you want to give it a shot.

Even though your degree doesn’t have anything to do with nursing, it should still satisfy many of your core educational requirements. This means that instead of enrolling in school as a college freshman, you may be eligible to enter an accelerated program.

In that case, you’ll be able to get your requirements out of the way within 12-18 months. Or maybe you are still an English major— it’s a difficult condition to shake— but you really want to try your hand at education.

Depending on where you live, that could be an even easier transition. In this case, the licensing requirements might be satisfied in under a year.

Do you get the idea? Your previous training should not be seen as a barrier to the career you want. Instead, look for ways that you can use it to serve as a bridge to where you would like to go.

Conclusion

Making a career change is not easy, but it’s also not as hard as you’re probably assuming. The hardest part for many people is taking the first step. Acknowledging that you are unhappy and making the difficult decision to do something about it.

You’ll probably find that, even though the work ahead might be tough at times, doing it brings you a sense of relief—possibly even joy. Life is too short to work a job you hate. Figure out a career path that will blow your hair back, and then figure out what steps are necessary to make it work. You can do this.

Photo Credit

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Guest Author Bio
Sarah Daren

With a Bachelor’s in Health Science along with an MBA, Sarah Daren has a wealth of knowledge within both the health and business sectors. Her expertise in scaling and identifying ways tech can improve the lives of others has led Sarah to be a consultant for a number of startup businesses, most prominently in the wellness industry, wearable technology and health education. She implements her health knowledge into every aspect of her life with a focus on making America a healthier and safer place for future generations to come.

Victims of cyberbullying are twice as likely to experience thoughts of suicide.

It’s a hard time to be a child and a scary time to be a parent. While it can be hard to detect when your child is experiencing issues at school or online, there are some common signs and symptoms of cyberbullying.

In this article, we take a look at how you can identify those signs, and talk about what comes next.

Unease About Going to School

When your child expresses a firm desire to avoid school, it is often a sign that they are experiencing some form of bullying. There is, of course, a spectrum of avoidance behavior. It is normal for kids to complain about tests or homework. It is certainly normal for kids to want to sleep in or pursue hobbies and interests instead of going to class.

It is not normal for kids to routinely invent illnesses or other reasons they can’t go to class. Nor is it typical for kids to display clear signs of intense anxiety at the thought of going.

When avoidance behavior becomes extreme and routine, it is almost always a sign that something out of the ordinary is taking place. While the culprit may not be cyberbullying, or in-person bullying, these are possibilities to keep in mind. Especially when your child’s avoidance behavior displays some of the other qualities we will describe in this article.

Unusual Cyber Activity

Victims of cyberbullying often appear visibly shaken when they are using their devices. They may become anxious or moody while all on their phone or tablet. However, they will also opt to use these devices more often— sometimes even compulsively, as a way of seeing what has been said about them.

This sign, by itself, could also coordinate with cell phone or social media addiction— a legitimate psychological disorder that can cause anxiety and depression.

Either way, it’s a sign that warrants follow-up questions and a reasonable level of concern.

Cagey Behavior

If your child displays a sudden unwillingness to discuss their personal life— particularly as it relates to online activity— this may be another indication that they are experiencing cyberbullying. This is, admittedly, a difficult consideration to identify when it comes to dealing with teenagers. When are they ever forthcoming about information, right?

If you notice that your child is beginning to withdraw, it’s important to actively seek communication. If they become particularly cagey about discussing their cyber life, or their personal connections, it may very well be an indication that they are experiencing some form of bullying.

A Sudden Decrease in Social Activity

Victims of bullying often choose not to engage in social activities. While the decision to stay home on the weekends needn’t be troubling in its own right, it can be considered cause for concern when it represents a significant departure from their usual activity.

If your child has always enjoyed spending time with their friends, but suddenly stops altogether, it will usually be for a reason— and one that requires your attention.

Changes in Sleeping or Eating Patterns

Any sudden change in your child’s sleeping or eating habits should be noted. That said, some normal changes may not be cause for significant concern. It is normal for kids to begin eating and sleeping more around the time they get to high school— both activities fuel the significant amount of growth they do during this time.

However, when the change seems very abrupt, and without context, it could be related to an emotional challenge that they are experiencing. When you notice a change in their eating and sleeping that coordinates with any of the other issues described in this list, it is worth further exploration.

References to Suicide or Depression

This is one of the most obvious causes for concern that you will encounter. If your child says that they are anxious, depressed, or experiencing thoughts of suicide, it’s something that will require your immediate attention.

It is easier to dismiss these statements than you might at first think. As a parent, you don’t want anything to be seriously wrong with your child. That desire for their health and wellness can make it easy to dismiss significant warning signs.

Don’t make that mistake. When suicide has been mentioned, it is important to take immediate action in the form of a psychological evaluation.

It’s Hard

It really is. Almost all of the considerations listed above, with perhaps the exception of the final one, can be considered normal behaviors for a teenager. Except you’re probably reading this article because they didn’t feel very normal to you.

That feeling of unease is perhaps your most powerful tool in identifying when something is troubling your child. Don’t ignore it. If you think that they are going through a hard time don’t wait for the signs to become more significant. Act on it. Start having conversations with them.

If those conversations don’t get you anywhere, consider speaking with a school counselor for further advice and input.

Schools do have resources designed for addressing precisely this problem. Of course, you do want to make sure your actions don’t alienate your child or damage their trust in you. Make sure it all starts with a frank conversation.

Tell them why you are concerned. Tell them you would like to work together to discuss what is going on. Explain that if that doesn’t get anywhere, you will need to take additional steps, which might involve contacting their school.

It’s possible that the issue is not cyberbullying at all. It’s also possible that you will still need to contact their school, even if your child cooperates with what you are saying. No matter what, you can pretty much count on the experience being at least emotionally difficult for everyone involved.

One of the toughest truths for parents is that you can’t protect your children from everything. But by being proactive and determined, you can help prevent problems from escalating.

Photo Credit

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Guest Author Bio
Sarah Daren

With a Bachelor’s in Health Science along with an MBA, Sarah Daren has a wealth of knowledge within both the health and business sectors. Her expertise in scaling and identifying ways tech can improve the lives of others has led Sarah to be a consultant for a number of startup businesses, most prominently in the wellness industry, wearable technology and health education. She implements her health knowledge into every aspect of her life with a focus on making America a healthier and safer place for future generations to come.

Being a good listener is about so much more than being able to simply hear. If you need help with hearing, a visit to HearCanada can help; but for now, we will focus on building our skills. Listening will teach you how to be more empathetic, read non-verbal cues, and improve your overall social skills.

Being a good listener takes years of continual practice. While it’s not something that you can develop overnight, there are a few things that you can do right now to get started. Let’s take a closer look at a few things you can do right now to improve your listening skills instantly.

Put Down the Phone

The greatest barricade to being a good listener is a distraction. Smartphones and other online devices have become the most distracting things in our daily lives. When you want to give someone your attention, put your phone down. If you can’t set it down, put it in your pocket, turn off the notifications, or power it down so that your notifications, emails, and calls will not distract you from your audience. This is especially important to enable your confidant to feel like you are making them a priority.

Retire to a Quiet Space

When someone asks for your attention or to speak to you in confidence, it’s best to move the conversation to an area with more privacy and quiet. Having a meaningful conversation when surrounded by noise can be incredibly difficult. When you retire to a quiet space, your confidant will know that you are interested in hearing them clearly and giving them your full attention. Moving to a quiet space can also eliminate some misunderstandings.

Limit Your Responses

People who are constantly calculating a response to a conversation tend to be poor listeners. When giving your attention, it is your job to hear what is being said, not to construct a response in your head. To improve your listening skills, try to limit your responses to what is being said. Unless someone asks for an opinion or a direct answer to a question, it’s best to let them speak until their point is delivered.

Repeat Back Details

When actively listening, it’s best to clarify a few times during the conversation. You can repeat back to your confidant important details to clarify and regroup. Not only will this help you to understand clearly what is being said, but it shows the person with whom you are speaking that you are hearing them and processing the details.

Resist Sharing Comparisons

When someone comes to you for a conversation, it’s best to keep the focus on them for the moment. While we all have experiences to share, it’s not in their best interest for you to share your comparison stories. Your confidant is looking for solutions, not one-up-you stories that are irrelevant. If you have had a similar experience, instead of sharing the details, try using your experience to share your empathy for what they are going through.

Follow these simple tips if you want to become a better listener in your life instantly.

Photo Credit

Photo is from Pixabay

Guest Author Bio
Pat Lee

Pat Lee was born in January 1992. Today, she is a digital marketer who has several years of experience in working with non-profit organizations. She has extensive knowledge in the fields of Education, Computer Science, and Psychology. When she isn’t helping build brands, she practices Muay Thai and runs marathons.

Yep. Sock monkey portraits.

Sock Monkey Portraits

The series of paintings began as a tribute to my late mother. Not long after she passed, I found the threadbare monkey among her belongings. He was missing a pom-pom, and his little body needed shoring up, but his big wide red grin was engaging! I knew I had to take him home with me.

A few years passed before I began to create the tribute painting. As I decided what items to gather for a still-life painting competition, I remembered Mom’s sock monkey. I laughed and knew that he was the perfect item to add to the still-life.

It turned out that the sock monkey was a great choice! It embodied Mom’s playful, loving spirit. The painting was infused with her energy, and I was happy to discover that people could feel it when they encountered my work.

I painted and painted and painted and painted. Did I tell you I painted? Over the course of 25 years, I have created 50 sock monkey portraits. It was a great way to process my grief. The artwork has been licensed on several products. I once had a painting teacher that remarked, “You’re the type of person who believes if a little bit is good, a lot is better.” I’ll admit I lean in that direction, and it’s been a fun journey.

Oddly enough, until recently, I never successfully sewed a sock monkey of my own.

I attempted to create a sock monkey in the early years of this venture, but it sure wasn’t pretty! First, the seams were wonky, and much stuffing escaped. Then, the monkey unraveled when I tried to remove the stitching and rework it.

I admit I was frustrated, and a bit unraveled myself! I quickly lost interest in the project. In the end, I threw what was left of the poor monkey into the trash. From then on, I figured I wasn’t up to sock monkey-making and that I should stick to painting.

Recently, I was compelled to try again. My creative life and business revolve around sock monkeys, and I felt that I needed to make one from scratch to be authentic with my work. So, I gathered all the supplies and made a play date with my twin sister. (Yeah, I’m 63 and still have play dates with my sister.)

I’m not sure if it’s a twin thing or a sibling thing, but we seemed to revert to our childhood ways during the merry monkey-making. We giggled. We shared insight. We competed. It was a day well spent. Here’s what I learned along the way:

Just because I couldn’t do something in the past doesn’t mean I cannot do it in the future.

Sharing challenges lightens the load. We offered encouragement and insight to one another.

We marveled that, like life, sometimes you need to tear things apart and reinvent them in a brand-new way.

Patience and careful planning truly are a virtue. That old saying “measure twice, cut once” was passed along for a reason.

Infuse play into the project and quit taking myself so seriously.

Have a plan but remain flexible. Things will happen along the way that requires Plan B, C, or even Z! Embrace the challenges and learn to trust that the diversion is the right path.

Michele and Leonato

Meet brothers Michele and Leonato. They are named after two of our ancestors. Michele was made by my sister Cheryl, and I created Leonato. They are joyful proof that if you change your thoughts about what you think you can’t do, you might just create something wonderful.

If you’d like to make a sock monkey of your own, visit How To Make A Sock Monkey.

Photo Credits

Photos are by Shannon Grissom – All Rights Reserved

Now that I was well into my 3rd year of this commute as a high school junior, little surprised me. I was used to the interminable delays at the slightest dusting of snow. I had even become friends with Sal, the father of 3 who always wore suits that were just a bit too big for him. Despite being in different phases of life, we were united by our commute. Sal was traveling to the city daily to support his family. His dream was to send his kids to the best schools so they could access opportunities he never had. 

I, on the other hand, was already at one of those schools. I was commuting to Regis, an elite, Jesuit all-boys high school on the Upper East Side. With an entrance exam, interview, and acceptance rate of less than 10 percent, the application process was rigorous. 

As a result, all the boys fortunate enough to enter the hallowed grounds were on the fast track to conventional success. I visualized that future every day: elite college, grad school, fancy apartment in the city and mansion in the Hamptons. That’s what I thought I wanted, and I was willing to do anything to get it. “I’ll show everyone,” I thought. Why I felt the need to prove something, I wasn’t entirely sure. 

But it was enough to get me to start my days at 5 am and end them well after I returned home from basketball practice and train delays. I usually walked through my front door at 8 pm and immediately hunkered down on the mountain of homework before me. For three years, I was certain I was making the right sacrifices. Then, out of nowhere I was stopped in my tracks. 

When I became a retreat leader my junior year, I was assigned to one called Quest. The Quest retreat is exactly that, and this quest led me to discover the opportunities I had missed. On the last day of this experience, the chaplain played a song called, Slip on By, by Austin Webb. While the song seemed to have little impact on the other students, for some reason its message about wasted time and lost opportunities brought me to tears. 

I was not quite sure why the song moved me in such a way. I mean, I was a little too young to have regrets about wasted time. But I kept coming back to one verse in particular:

Hear the sound of my little boy saying
Daddy can you come play with me?
But I was too busy
Then one day my baby grew up and went to war
I never thought he’d be gone in the blink of an eye
Don’t let it slip on
Don’t let it slip on
Don’t let it slip on by

As I sit here to write this with a blurry-looking screen, I can assure you that it still elicits an emotional response. I couldn’t figure out why this verse struck such a chord with me at the time. Then I got to thinking about my role as the eldest of five children and where I might have come up short.

Because of the significant age difference between him and his older siblings, my 10-year-old brother, Brady, is often left without a playmate. He was and still is a spirited boy who is constantly imploring me to play with him. After spending a short time warming up for a football catch, he’ll race up to me, sweating and smiling, and say “Come on Shane. Me versus you. I’ll crush you!” 

The song served as a reminder of the times I’d sent him away. Sure there were many times when I accommodated him, but whether it was because of a long commute, a late basketball practice, or homework and other responsibilities, I felt that too often I’d turned him down. Webb punctuates this feeling when he sings, “And God gives us only so much precious time, Don’t let it slip on by.” 

Fast forward five years, and I’m a Harvard graduate entering the job market. My work ethic hasn’t changed too much; I find great joy in challenging myself and working together with others towards a goal. That said, the song’s message continues to remind me of the importance of balance.

During my junior year of college, I took a psychology course called: “The Science of Happiness.” Other than the famous introductory Computer Science 50, it was the most sought-after course on campus. It became clear that even the highest achieving youngsters struggle to find happiness and joy. In fact, over 20% of Harvard’s undergraduates sought mental health services before the pandemic and that number has since ballooned. 

In one particularly compelling segment of the course, the professor introduced the “Harvard Study on Adult Development”–the longest-running study on happiness. For the project, researchers collected all sorts of health information as they followed over 700 men from their teenaged years in the 1930s. 

The main finding of the project was the overwhelming association between happiness and close relationships. The evidence is clear: prioritizing time with the ones we love is the single greatest predictor of our well-being. 

The message that we’re fed time and again is the importance of productivity and success, often at significant costs. We’re expected to sacrifice our time with friends and family to be “successful.” That’s the American Dream, right? 

I’m not so sure. It seems to me that it doesn’t have to be one or the other. We don’t have to neglect our relationships in favor of work or vice versa. The game is to find the sweet spot and recognize the importance of both.  

I try to keep this lesson at the forefront of my mind. I spend more time with my siblings, friends, and family now than I ever have before. So when Brady and I are having a mock wrestling match and he gets me in a clinch and whispers in my ear, “Shane, When you move away from home, I’m gonna miss you SO much!” I realize that every moment with him and my loved ones is a privilege I don’t ever want to let slip on by.

Photo Credit

Photo is from Pexels

Guest Author Bio
Shane O’Donoghue

Shane O’Donoghue is a copywriter & digital marketing consultant for professionals in the health industry. He lives a stone’s throw away from Fenway Park in Boston despite being a Yankees fan (yikes!). In his spare time, he loves training at Orange Theory, journaling, and exploring Boston’s historical neighborhoods. If you’d like to connect with Shane or read more of his work, you can find him on Linkedin or at his website. 

When people die, their deaths haunt me. I think about them all the time, especially those who died young, or whose lives were taken by disease or accident. When I see a blue sky on a crisp, fall day, my mind wanders to those who have died and I always think to myself, Oh, you are missing the most gorgeous day today. It saddens me that they are unable to witness the beauty of that perfect blue sky, or of the bright orange, yellow and red leaves on the trees.

I suppose some people would call me sensitive. I would have said that about myself years ago. Today, I’d call it conscious. I’m very conscious of my life, of myself and of the world. I see it for what it is, and have given up the rose-colored glasses. Things don’t really shock me anymore. People’s situations don’t send me running the other way. But it doesn’t mean I don’t question their situations in my mind or feel upset by their decisions. I just know I’m more conscious of the elements of emotion. 

As a young adult I was driven by the works of The Beat Generation, the poets and writers who wrote, lived and breathed life and made it bigger than it was; those writers who burned with life. I, too, wanted to go, go, go. And I did, until I burned out. That kind of lifestyle can get you killed.

Each of us has a different philosophy of life. I used to get hooked on different gurus, people that I admired, people I thought were smarter and more talented than I was. I read books by the dozens about all kinds of interesting people and their lives. Now, as I get older, I realize my life is just as interesting, just as complicated and just as creative as anyone else’s. I see that I’m the creator, the visionary of my own life. All of those writers and scientists and creative people brought me here, to this place, where I can now rightfully claim a piece of my own heart’s desire.

My passion for life has seen me through many ups and downs. Always by my side are my friends and loved ones, urging me on. They are my soldiers, the ones who push me forward. And through our connections and our passions, whatever they may be, we carry on this journey of life, thrilled to have compatriots to negotiate the dark side of life with and to help us into the light.

Life is so sweet. There is so much to do and, it seems, so little time. As I age, time slips by so quickly; it’s almost frightening. Will I ever get to do the things I want to do before I die? Will I see my grandchildren and watch them grow? Will I see the parts of the world I have always wanted to see? Will I always be surrounded by friends and loved ones alike?

I have passion for being in the world, being in the fight, being in love, or just being. I want to continue to discover new and wonderful things every single day! Like today, for instance. I learned a new word: sate. It was a word my daughter used in an essay. I thought it was a spelling mistake, but no, she quickly pointed out it was a word. I was thrilled!

So, the journey never ends. It changes constantly. Life would be pretty dull if it didn’t. I can only be thankful for those small things that help us grow, like trees in the fall, shedding their leaves, awaiting rebirth in spring. Like I do. Every day I hope and pray that each day will be a rebirth of my heart’s desires.

Photo Credit

Photo by Martha Farley – all rights reserved

News reports tell of people being placed on round-the-clock hospital ventilators, having to struggle alone in the absence of family due to pandemic protocols – hanging on… one   measured breath after another… minute to minute… week after week. True warriors. Being a person blessed by good health, I’ve never known what it’s like to be that sick.

Stuck staring at the ceiling, surrounded by people they don’t know. Yet, thankful for small mercies: professional caring hands that may be the last patients ever hold. Illness affects everyone’s family and their lifestyle from young to old. You’re no longer able to help others – not when you’re already running on empty.

One of our daughters asked me about our role in society. As a “raconteur”, it includes my various musings as a storyteller. So, I see my role as simply reflecting back to others what I’ve learned – being the middleman – and often, the ‘man in the mirror’ interpreting what I see. But – at this confessional moment – I know times that I’ve missed the mark. Sadly, because of my ‘me first’ attitude, it’s meant I’ve been distracted… not being there for others.

“I ran so fast that time and youth at last ran out
I never stopped to think what life was all about
And every conversation I can now recall
Concerned itself with me and nothing else at all”

~ Yesterday When I Was Young by Charles Aznavour & Elton John
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But no matter our health situation, our age group, or anything else; we can still do something to help make a difference. Maybe something small, like helping a neighbour who’s a care giver. They don’t even need to know who did it. Also, local charitable groups would appreciate our talents towards some volunteer project… something that ties into our own passion. And, of course, helping out financially is always appreciated.

Plus, we can always be mindful of others in our prayers and reflections. Like my dad use to say, it’s the thought that counts… something we can do before rising for the day.

Peace Rose

“May the stars carry your sadness away,
May the flowers fill your heart with beauty,
May hope forever wipe away your tears,
And, above all, may silence make you stronger.”

~ by Chief Dan George

The best thing? It’s never too late to re-start. Some “Boomer” friends of mine tell me that 70 years-old is the new 50. Why not be grateful for what we have while appreciating what others endure?

There’s always been anecdotal evidence associated with the good feelings we get when helping others. In addition, verifiable scientific studies – including a recent University of Pittsburgh report – show that our support to others activates a neural pathway in the brain that boosts our well-being.

Songwriter, John Lennon, was once asked the best lyrics he ever wrote? “That’s easy”, replied Lennon, “All you need is love.”

That’s the way I figure it. – FP

Photo Credit

Peace Rose by RÜŞTÜ BOZKUŞ from Pixabay

Peace Rose and Book – from pixy.org

First published at fredparry.ca

Guest Author Bio
Fred Parry

Fred Parry lives in Southern Ontario. He is a lover of people and a collector of stories, music, wisdom, and grandchildren. His raison d’etre? “I’m one of those people who believe that if my work serves the common good, it will last; if not, it will die with me. As a freelancer – including ten years as a Torstar columnist – I still believe that’s true.” His book, ‘The Music In Me’ (2013) Friesen Press is also available via Indigo / Chapters.

Blog / Website: www.fredparry.ca

The common thread I have been hearing as I speak to people in and outside of my healing practice is that, as things begin to open back up for a second or third time, it’s just not the same and they are grieving the way it was before this all happened.

As much as I have also found myself daydreaming of how it was before the big “P,” I can’t help but think back to another time in my life where I thought I had lost everything and felt similar to this.

In 2016, I was involved in a freak head-on car accident. When I woke up in the ICU after a week-long coma, my body was so injured I couldn’t move. As I tried to put the pieces of my life back together, I wanted so badly to go back to the way I was before the accident where I could walk again and take a full deep breath into my lungs. I was a very healthy, active yoga instructor and full-time hairstylist at the time and would never have imagined anything like this ever happening to me.

My life was completely turned around, I thought I had lost everything. I had no money, no health insurance, and could no longer stand on my own two legs to work. I felt scared and lost and had no idea what I was going to do next. When I found myself longing for my life to go back to how it was before it was broken, a question came to me, “Was I completely happy in all areas of my life before this?” The answer was no. There was always room for more growth or something I wasn’t happy about and wanted to change about myself or my life. That’s when another question quickly arose, “What if I was to fully accept what was happening to me right now and see this as an opportunity for me to now create a whole new life for myself, one that felt more in alignment with what I truly wanted?”

Because I was so busy before the accident, I had missed so much of the beauty that surrounded me. I had forgotten to stop and smell the sweet roses of life, but now I was given a clean slate to start again and co-create a life that was filled with more truth and purpose.

At first, this experience was the scariest thing I had ever encountered. But, as time went on, I learned how to really surrender to the changes I was going through. This helped me to trust the journey ahead even if I had no idea what that looked like for me or my loved ones.

Once I was able to surrender and accept what was happening, I realized that instead of worrying about everything in the past, future, and all of the things that I had no control of outside of myself, I allowed myself to be in the present moment, because that was all I had.

In that present moment, when I gave myself permission to let go of any worry and fully embrace the energy of trust, that’s when I went from worrier to warrior!

I learned that I had a choice on how I wanted to feel. When I just let myself feel whatever I was feeling without any judgment or trying to fix it, change it or not feel it all, but fully accept each moment, that’s where the healing and transformation happened. I decided that instead of living in worry and fear, I would build an empire of love.

As humans, we experience things in our life that bring us either pain or joy. The way we respond is our choice. We can choose to suffer through something and let it break us down, or we can choose to face it, feel it, look it straight in the eye and find that warrior strength inside to ask ourselves instead, “what am I learning from this experience, how can I grow from this and where can I bring more gratitude into my life for the warrior that I already am?”

By allowing ourselves to feel it all without suppressing and being with the emotions as they flow through, we can bring more compassion and forgiveness to ourselves and to others.

As well as allowing ourselves to grieve and feel through this huge shift, which is a part of being human and perfectly normal, it can also be a time of co-creation with yourself. What would you like to be, do and have? All of this exists inside of each of us already. When we allow ourselves the time to slow down and surrender to the moment, we come back into alignment with our truth and find the answers within.

When I find myself in full worry mode, I use these 3 easy steps for shifting into a warrior instead:

Stop and bring awareness to the fact that I am worrying! Bringing awareness to the noisy worry thoughts is a wonderful tool. Once we can recognize that we are in worry mode, it’s easier to be able to shift it. say out loud, “I choose to let go of worry now and I trust the process.”

Take 10 full deep breaths with my hands on my belly to connect to my inner strength.

Say 3 things I am grateful for. This brings me back into the present moment.

Each moment is another opportunity for us to learn, grow and invite more love and compassion in for ourselves, others, and the world.

The only way to heal is to trust the process, let go of worry and remember that you have all of the answers within! You are brave. You are a spirit warrior!

Photo Credit

Warrior Woman by Xuan Nguyen on Unsplash

Sunset Man by Zac Durant on Unsplash

Guest Author Bio
Gianna Mauceri

Gianna Mauceri is a spiritual mentor and author of Soul of a Spirit Warrior – A True Story of Healing, Survival and Resilience. Gianna helps those who have experienced any kind of trauma come back to a place of self-compassion, love, and forgiveness. After eighteen years of hairdressing, Gianna was involved in a severe car accident which only helped her realize her true purpose was to be a guide for others in this way and offer the healing tools that helped her survive, heal, and live a life of unconditional love and passion. Gianna now runs her own healing business in San Diego, CA and is also a co-owner of the Tranquility School of Healing.

Follow Gianna on: Instagram | Facebook